Here Goes...

Soooo.. this has been going around, and I thought I should jump on the band wagon, cuz it's a fun little thing. You all should do the same because it's a fun thing to pass around.


any and all who read this, feel free to post, and i'll reply... and also, feel free to tell your friend or others, so they can post if they'd like. open, honest, and PUBLIC information can solve a lot of problems i think.

1. Reply to this post, because I would like to say a few words about you.
2. I will also tell you what song(s) remind me of you when I hear it.
3. I will also tell you what celebrity/public [or fictional] person you remind me of, either personality-wise or looks-wise.
4. I will also give ONE WORD that I associate with you when I think of you.
5. We all could use a boost now and then, so steal this for your journal and make someone else's day as well.

It's coming, I can feel it.

I hate change. I have the hardest time adjusting to it. Most of the time I want to run in a screaming retreat back into my comfort zone, but I know that this time, I can't. The new semester is here, and there's so many things that are different. It's nice to see old faces, and not so fun to be missing others. And as a side note, Rachael, the semester won't be the same without you, and I am sorry that I am such an awful friend. I miss you and hopefully I'll see you soon. I heard that you asked about me the other day, and I hope that you don't hate me for not calling or being in touch for the last little while. I've been trying to rearrange my life and that means that I haven't been around anywhere much. I'm sorry. I guess that goes for everyone else too. I've been kind of wrapped up in my own thing for a while, but I'm hoping that in the next week I'll get down to a pattern, and I'll be able to be available more frequently.

I've screwed up so many times, and just been too tired or exhausted to get back on track, but this time I'm going to! And I just pray that this determination sticks. I want so bad for things to be okay; for my life to be where I saw it four years ago when I graduated from high school. But that didn't happen. Now I just have to make sure that the next four years are better.

Introspection sucks... it's such a fine line to walk. If you're not careful you can end up hating yourself and your life. I do that too frequently. However, I cannot fix what's wrong if I don't look inside myself to figure out what makes me tick. So, I'll walk that line, and pray that I don't over step my bounds.

Again, I want to apologize to all of my friends who have been there for me. If I'm inattentive, or rude, or just... anything... please forgive me, and let me know, because I didn't mean it. I'm just focusing on fixing me. However, don't let that discourage you from coming to me if you need someone to listen to you, because I plan on finding you if I'm ready to die. :-D I love you all, and I'm asking for your forgiveness before hand, because I know I'm gonna screw up, but I'll try not to. And thank you... for everything.